Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Real life first

Of course, I have to bid my farewell to Big Red Kitty aka BRK who has announced that he's taking a leave from WoW and blogging. Dechion just posted a great post about the same incident, much better than I could ever think of writing.

I got to know BRK quite short while ago. Sure I had seen links and references toward his blog, but as being a hunter isn't much like me, I had avoided that track. But knowing how well known character BRK is, it hadn't slipped by. It's a loss for a while, but surely BRK has built up such a momentum in hunter and WoW blogging that someone will come up and continue from there. Like it was with Phaelia's announcement, the mourning lasted for a while, and the blogging continued.

As a matter of fact, I'm writing because it's quite frightening to think of the similarities of these two prominent bloggers to 'take a leave': personal reasons, neglecting family/spouse, real life. Dechion put it very nicely in the last two phrases of his post:
The forest grew darker still as the bonfire went out, but the home fires burned all the brighter. In the end that is what matters.
That should be what matters: home, family, the community we're really living. Not the virtual reality, fantasy world.

It saddens me enormously to read that -however prominent and respected member of this geekish MMO community ever- has finally noticed how s/he has neglected the real life, the one that really matters.

Like I posted earlier , everyone of us, who is playing WoW, War, EQ, EQ2 with any fervour is a hardcore player: How hardcore depends on the definition. If you take the time which you use in game or in game related activities and turn that into any other hobby, I bet you could be master of anything. Just think of all the time spent in MMO turned into practising singing, playing a guitar or a piano, riding, skating... Anything.

That's a lot.

And if you think of someone spending similar, or even less time in a hobby, you most certainly think of that person as being some sort of fanatic or too involved in the hobby.

Time to think again.

Like I commented in Saresa's Destructive Reach that my wake up call came when my kids were asked where I was better than other daddies. The youngest, 7 years old, responded: My daddy is best in playing WoW. Mind you, I am not raiding, don't have a single level capped toon and I'm not spending most of my time by the computer. Though my family sees it that way.

I wish all the best to BRK and Phaelia and may the balance between life and hobbies be reached for the rest of us.


Dechion said...

Well said. Home is far and away the most important thing.

After reading BRK's post yesterday I sat down with my wife and later my kids to see how they saw my gaming fitting into our lives.

The don't have an issue with it anymore (I used to play a lot more) but have promised not to be shy if they see one.

It was a real eye opener, for a lot of people I think.

Thanks also for the compliment on todays post. I even tried to keep it under a thousand words for a change ;)

Ysharros said...

Noticing the importance of real things doesn't necessarily mean we neglected them -- though I'll admit it usually means we skated pretty close. ;)

I have no time for people who don't at least understand the basic fact that, while we all love games and many of us love blogging, it's a relatively unimportant part of our lives compared to family, health, work, and all the REALLY important stuff.

Very nicely said. And hell, even *I* had heard of BRK, and I hadn't played WoW in 4 years! ;)

Nimgimli said...

Well said, indeed!

I've been on both sides of the fence. I've gone down the rabbit hole to the point where real life stuff was being neglected (way way back in UO!).

And I've had the lady in my life (not the current one!) get really sucked into a game to the point where it felt like I was living alone for a while.

I dealt with that ok, but I'm a gamer so I could understand it. I can't imagine how baffling it must be to non-gamers.

Moderation in all things!!

Unknown said...

@Pete, isn't that what Blizzard states in the loading screen tips, too? Moderation in all things, even in World of Warcraft.

But when we human creatures become fascinated with something, obsessed even, we create a way of denial: I'm alright, nothing's wrong. And it takes usually at least a good snap to get out of that.


Crucifer said...

This is a hard one, and its something people really neglect: their human side. Life becomes a monotony of going out for work (or school), working hard, coming home and having dinner and then playing World of Warcraft. And that's the rot right there. Obsessing over pixels that don't even belong to you.

I sat down some time ago and worked out that I would like two days playing World of Warcraft, days when I could just loosen up and have fun. One of those days has since been substituted fortnightly for a Vampires The Requiem P&P Roleplaying Game. The other time, I spend with the wife or watching tv shows.

That's not to say I don't dip my toes in WoW on other days too, but not to the exclusion of all else. As you say, moderation in all things.

Unknown said...

In a way I'm looking forward to the beginning of our dogs' training and competition season for this: It may be that my WoW will go on hiatus for the summer as I'm engaged in more 'healthy' activities.

But... most probably I'll keep the account going for the bad days and for the kids. Either way, I'm funding the Blizzard's secret project over the year.